Easter and Grief

I can confidently say I've never fully grasped the power of Easter until this year.

My life was full of doubts.  As I witnessed acquaintances find deep comfort in Heaven as their loved one passed, I wondered if I would find the same comfort if I ever lost someone dear.  Did I really believe in paradise that Jesus promised to the thief hanging next to him on the cross?

 Like so many lessons in life, I wish I had been sure of this particular belief without the accompanying experience;

I want patience without waiting.

I want love without vulnerability.

I want wisdom without experience.

I want appreciation without  loss.

I know what I believe about Easter, my doubts are gone. I know with all my heart where my brother-in-love Caleb is today. He was only 36 , with a fiance and four young children, too much life still left to live. He loved with all his heart, including his love for his Savior.

I know where he is, but I am still selfish. I want our brother back. I want my beloved mother and father-in-law to have never felt the pain of losing a child.  I want my husband to have his big brother back. I want Caleb to be the one to raise his four kids. I want him to spend a lifetime here with the newly found love.

I am thankful  to know that for the 16 years I was his little sister-in-love, I felt protected and loved.

It is OK to believe he in paradise, and still weep.  Jesus wept.  Jesus wept when Lazarus was in the grave, even with the full knowledge he could call him back. If Jesus wept over loss, I can too.

As we weep, my heart knows the joy and grief is mixed together.

When I really ponder on where he is, I couldn't wish him back to this world of pain.

Our brother was carpenter. He loved wood working and building something from nothing.  Caleb rushed into new fun wood working projects with an excitement that was contagious. How my heart aches with joy that Caleb is spending eternity with Jesus the Carpenter.

As much we we loved him, Caleb was always infuriatingly late...like showing up to his own surprise party an hour late! That guy would be so excited with whatever he was doing in the moment, that all other obligations fell away.  If you were waiting on him, it was infuriating, but if you were the one he was with, it made you feel deeply valued.

He is now the one waiting for us, and I bet he can't wait to share paradise.  I am not happy about his death, but I have never felt the true joy of the Easter deeper. The joy is Easter is not happy, it is painful.

Praise you Lord. Praise you for your defeat of death.  Thank you for this beautiful & painful salvation.

A Focus on Easter

Parenting "Fail" Lead to Refocus
In 2012,  as we left for early carry-in breakfast at church, I asked the boys what they knew about Easter in the van.  One of my sons replied, "I think it's something with candy and a bunny."

  Even though they were only five, I felt like this was a HUGE  parenting fail for me.  Now of course at their age, they were not ready for the more gruesome details of the passion, but I was shocked how little focus I had put on this most important holiday. I had outsourced all their Easter education to the children's church hour, which was wrong on so many levels.

Reason For The Season- Manger versus Cross
The manger is much less intimidating than the cross.
My son's comment put a spotlight on the fact that that just a few months before I had spent endless hours preparing for Christmas, but not even a full hour preparing them for the reason for Easter, our salvation.

As I stepped back, I was convicted that I had three tubs of Christmas decorations, but not one of Easter decor. In December we remind ourselves to see the true "reason for the season" for Christmas, but somehow I let it get lost in the spring beauty of new flowers, plans for gardens, and candy eggs.  I think this is a very intentional scheme of the enemy because the manger is less intimating that the cross.


HOW TO REFOCUS ON EASTER WITH YOUR KIDS
I tried this week to focus as much, if not more, onto Easter as I did on Christmas. Every night our bedtime bedtime reading is a Bible Reading. Younger children might need to color on one of the Holy Week coloring pages while you read.

 It was rejuvenating for ALL of us as we focused our attention on our Savior. All the other busyness of life faded away as I stared with all intent on the perfection of the Cross and the fulfillment of so many Old Testament prophecies.


Easter Week 
Through Bible Study Fellowship, I was challenged to read straight from Scripture to my kids, instead of all of the kid's books about Easter.  Don't get me wrong, they are all great books, but I do not want to underestimate the Holy Spirit's ability to interpret the Word for my kids.  When our children's only source of the pretty Easter story are picture books, they tend to think of it as a pretend picture story, instead of God's true Word.  Kids can make amazing pictures in their head, READ TO THEM FROM THE WORD. Below are some of the ways we really focused on the beautiful act of love Jesus did for us during this most precious week.

No "Bible Voice"
I was convicted not to use my "Bible/Teacher Voice" when reading the Easter story.  If you don't know what this is, you have not been in a  preschool class recently.  It is a bit higher pitched than my normal voice, and sing-song, and the voice I use when reading pretend stories or picture books.  It just felt wrong and disingenuous, and conveyed the wrong message to my kids.

Easter Week Family Bible Reading 

Free Printable Easter Holy Week Bible Reading Plan and Coloring Pages

The Week BEFORE Holy Week

 Jesus prediction about his death.    Read Matthew 20:17-19

Holy Week

Palm Sunday- Jesus enters Jerusalem with shouts of Hosanna.  Hosanna means "Save us!"

• Read Zechariah 9:9
• Read Luke 19:28-40

Holy Monday- Jesus shows his authority by cleansing  the Temple.  The Jewish Leaders were not able about this show of power.

• Read Isaiah 56:1-8
• Read Luke 19:41-48

Holy Tuesday- The Temple leaders challenge Jesus with theological debates. Theology is the study of God and religion.

• Read Psalm 118:19-27
• Read Luke 20

Spy Wednesday- Jesus continues his teaching, which further upsets Jewish Leaders.  Jesus allows a woman to anoint him with really expensive oil, which is the tipping point for Judas, who go to religious authorities and offers to deliver Jesus.

• Read Luke 21
• Read Mark 14:1-11

Maundy Thursday- After celebrating the Passover with his disciples, Jesus went to the Garden of Gethsemane to pray, where Judas betrayed him. He was arrested and tortured while Peter denied him.

• Read Isaiah 50:4-10
• Read Luke 22:1-65

Good Friday- The Jewish leaders, with the help of Pilate, subjected Jesus to a mock trial that resulted in a death sentence for the one who would be called the King of the Jews. He was hastily crucified and quickly buried before the Sabbath began that evening. Use Homemade Resurrection Eggs to further explain to younger children, but I highly recommend leaving the 12th egg unopened until Sunday (see Saturday for why).

• Read Psalm 22:1-18
• Read Luke 22:66-71 and Luke 23:1-56

Holy Saturday-Traditionally this is the day of mourning after Good Friday. On Saturday evening, before bed, we turn off all the lights for just a few moments and talked about the darkness of the tomb.  When you turn it back on, tell them there is an exciting day coming where it isn’t going to be dark in the tomb anymore.

• Read Isaiah 52:13-15 and Isaiah 53
• Read Luke 23:56

Easter Sunday
A couple of women went to Jesus' tomb to anoint him for burial, but when they arrived, he wasn't there. The tomb was empty, and an angel greeted them with the news that Jesus was alive. The women hurried back to tell the others, and Jesus surprised his grieving disciples by showing up in their midst.

• Read Isaiah 52:7-10
• Read Luke 24 

1. OPEN LAST EGG  on your Resurrection Eggs!
2. Decorate! Instead of baskets filled with candy and toys, the boys woke up to balloons and streamers celebrating Jesus's Resurrection.  We decorate our house with a large He is Risen banner. It doesn't come out until Easter morning, and stays up for a few weeks!
3. Make Resurrection Rolls as you discuss how Jesus's friends laid him the tomb, but he arose 3 days later! You use a white (pure) marshmallow (symbolizes Jesus body).  You roll it in melted butter (oils), cinnamon and sugar (spices), and then put it in crescent rolls (tomb). After baking the marshmallow will "disappear"/melt!

Other Easter Week Activities

•  Passover Sedar- A family in our church invited us to a Christian Passover Seder.  What depth this adds to the Holy Week. We eat the same dinner our Jewish Savior Jesus himself ate with his disciples the night he was arrested.  We read the book "Hoppy Passover" before to show the boys what we would be doing. It seemed silly at first, but was extremely helpful in showing what they should expect, and they did very well the whole evening.

• Resurrection Garden- We did a simple grass Resurrection Garden at the beginning of the week (more instructions coming in later post).  The boys found sticks in the yard for the crosses. It took longer than I had hoped for the grass to grow.  Next year I will buy the quick growing seeds.
  

• Other Family Devotionals- There are some great resources from Focus on the Family that we incorporated into the week.

• You can decorate your house with a large He is Risen banner. The beautiful thing was through my kids excitement in the morning was they never once asked for an Easter Basket. I feel like we at least fixed our parenting fail just a bit. Now onto asking the Holy Spirit to help me with fixing  the many other things we have failed at this year....all a work in progress. ;)

Homemade Resurrection Eggs~EASTER

Young children are very concrete learner, and usually need something they can see or touch to fully understand a concept. Resurrection eggs are one of the  concrete ways we can share the story of Jesus' death and resurrection with our children.  Resurrection eggs can be purchased, but you can also make your own using items around your home.

To make your own resurrection eggs, you will need an ordinary egg carton and a dozen plastic eggs, a Bible, and the items listed below. 

Share about Jesus using one egg at a time. Explain in your own words (and ask your children) what each item symbolizes and read the verses from the Bible. Older children may read the verse.

 Eventually, even young children can tell the story of Jesus’ death and resurrection with the help of the symbols found in the eggs.  You may  print out below scriptures, or cut apart the below  scriptures into small strips and put them inside the egg

Homemade Resurrection Eggs

Egg #1 Oyster cracker (or crusty bread) 

While they were eating, Jesus took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to his disciples, saying, “Take and eat; this is my body.” Matthew 26:26 

Egg #2 Silver coins

Then one of the Twelve—the one called Judas Iscariot—went to the chief priests 15 and asked, “What are you willing to give me if I deliver him over to you?” So they counted out for him thirty pieces of silver. 16 From then on Judas watched for an opportunity to hand him over.  Matthew 26:14-16 

Egg #3 Purple cloth 

They stripped him and put a scarlet robe on him,

Matthew 27:28 

Egg #4 Thorns 

and then twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on his head.  Matthew 27:29 

Egg #5 Rope 

Wanting to satisfy the crowd, Pilate released Barabbas to them. He had Jesus flogged, and handed him over to be crucified. Mark 15:15 

Egg #6 Cross 

Finally Pilate handed him over to them to be crucified. So the soldiers took charge of Jesus. 17 Carrying his own cross, he went out to the place of the Skull (which in Aramaic is called Golgotha). John 19:16-17 

Egg #7 Nail 

There they crucified him, and with him two others—one on each side and Jesus in the middle. John 19:18 

Egg #8 Sign that says, “This is the king of theJews.” 

There was a written notice above him, which read: this is the king of the Jews. Luke 23:38 

Egg #9 Sponge (with vinegar) 

Immediately one of them ran and got a sponge. He filled it with wine vinegar, put it on a staff, and offered it to Jesus to drink. Matthew 27:48 

Egg #10 Cloves or spices  or cotton ball with essential oil

Then they went home and prepared spices and perfumes. But they rested on the Sabbath in obedience to the commandment. Luke 23:56 

Egg #11 Rock 

Joseph took the body, wrapped it in a clean linen cloth, 60 and placed it in his own new tomb that he had cut out of the rock. He rolled a big stone in front of the entrance to the tomb and went away.  Matthew 27:59-60 

Egg #12 EMPTY! 

The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified.6 He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay. Matthew 28:55-56