Saturday, October 5, 2019
We are not a drain to your church
My husband and I attended Caring Well Conference, a conference from Ethics and Religious Liberty Commitee, designed to care well for survivors of abuse in God's church.
I met a woman named Mary during a break, and I knew she was involved in the conference in some way because I'd seen on stage, so I told her I was praying for her. We chatted and she was lovely person. After she left I looked her up so see how she was involved with the conference, and then I realized I had been speaking with the amazing author of "We Too", Mary Demuth.
Mary was one of the last speakers of the week, and she shared a profound truth that God knew I needed to hear.
"We [survivors of abuse] are not a drain on your resources, we are a gift to you" -Mary Demuth
I have never been told that my story as a survivor of multiple forms of abuse was a GIFT to the church before. I've been told His glory is made perfect in my weakness, but it was never worded that my weakness and trauma are actually an essential part of God's church.
I've always subtly felt that the people in church really liked my story, but only when I share the healing, the tidied up part that is wrapped in a bow of closure. When you share the pain that ends normal conversations, it is uncomfortable.
Thank you Lord for letting me know I am not valuable to your church IN SPITE of my abuse stories, but BECAUSE of my past.
I am NOT drain to my church. I am not a drain to my husband or my family. I am not a drain to my friends. I have believed this lie for too long.
Not only in my weakness is God strong, but in my weaknesses, others are made strong. When we walk with broken, we walk in the sacrificial love of Jesus. When we listen well to deeply uncomfortable pain, we walk in the groaning and grief of the Holy Spirit. When we get angry and advocate on their behalf, we walk in the love of a Father who hates the evil being done to his chosen children.
Welcome the broken into your church not because it helps THEM, but because it is how God has chosen to make you more like his beautiful beautiful son.