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Sunday, December 30, 2018

Choosing Your Word for the New Year

I have noticed that many of my friends have stopped making New Year's resolutions.  Resolutions have been replaced instead by choosing a word for the new year; a word that a person wants to be the theme of their life. I like this practice better than resolutions mostly because it's not setting yourself up for failure. 

These word choices are motivated by an endless variety of life experiences and goals. I can not speak into the motivation of your word choice.  Each of us must reflect on our own goals, successes, and even failures as we choose our word for this next year.  
 I started choosing a word for the new year back in 2013. While I can not speak into your word choice, I can share the lessons I have learned though living through this process myself.
The times I prayed about the word choice God used it to prepare me for circumstances that I could never have seen coming. We may choose our word for the year, but God will choose how that word plays out in our life. 
The year I chose "wisdom" as my word was the year that I had to make a lot of huge life changing decisions, decisions that I never expected to make in the January before when I had picked the word. 
The year I chose "security" was the year I had just wanted to be more confident in my skinny jeans, but instead God brought about the circumstance of a toxic family member trying to re-enter  my life in order to challenge me to deal with all of the lies that I believed about myself, lies that had led to my insecurities. This toxic person had a warped view of who I was, and I had partially believed their view of me; I had to confront the person before I could confront the lies that kept me chained to insecurity. 
The year I chose "safe" ended up being a year full of battles; spiritual, emotional, and physical battles that God kept me safe in through his constant presence and protection. I had never felt more unsafe and scared than that year, yet I learned a new definition of what it meant it to be protected by God. 
The word you choose will not necessarily shape the circumstances of the next year, but it will shape your perspective inside of those circumstances.

Don't feel like you need your perfect word January 1st. I recommend praying and just waiting for inspiration. The past few years I have not had my word until Mid January.

I wish you a Happy New Year, and may God prepare you for 2019 with a word that gives a small glimpse into His plans for your heart. 

Friday, December 14, 2018

Recovering Fixer, The story of My Site's Name

Hello my name is Robyn, and I am a Recovering Fixer.  I am also a recovering people-pleaser and Enabler. I say Recovering because I know that I could easily slip back into those patterns when I don't keep up my guard.

While this site is mostly about homeschooling, the title "LEADING THEM TO THE ROCK"  was chosen to remind me  that I AM NOT THE ROCK.  I can't save anyone, I am not the highest rock. Homeschooling can't save my kids. I can't save my broken-hearted family members, or my unsaved loved ones.  I can not be enough to fix  the deepest wounds in their lives.

What I can do is be there to weep with them as they weep.  I can rejoice with them as they rejoice. I can loudly proclaim the God in whom I found healing.  I can share with them healing resources and confront with love when needed.

I can not save them or place their feet upon The Rock. I can not take responsibility for the reactions.  I can not make them change their behavior. I can not (and should not) protect people from consequences of their unhealthy patterns.  I can not be THE ROCK of salvation.

People can be rocks, but not THE ROCK
People can be a rock in your life. I wholeheartedly believe God's healing in my life has come through the arms and words of HIS PEOPLE.  They love me, they accept me, they sanctify me.  Please do not read this as an endorsement for Isolation from God's People.

But People can not be THE ROCK, the HIGHEST ROCK. Too many times in my life I have asked too much of people, or have allowed others to ask too much of me.  

I've tried to make humans my highest rock. Many times I expected people to heal my heart in ways that were unfair and unrealistic. I have placed family members and friends on pedestals of an idol, just to have them knocked off as they inevitably behave as a human with faults and flaws. 

I have subconsciously tried to be the Highest Rock to others in my life. Growing up with a mentally ill mother and toxic family dynamics created unhealthy coping mechanisms in me.  I was "the Fixer" in my family. 

Seeking healing though boundaries has taught me what I can do in others lives, and ultimately what I can't do. 

Be careful that you don't make others your Savior, or worse, try to be a Savior to others. 


Hear my cry, O Lord, listen to my prayer; 
from the end of the earth
 I call to you  when my heart is faint.
Lead me to the rock  that is higher than I,  
for you have been my refuge,  
a strong tower against the enemy.
Psalms 61: 1-3

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